It’s with a heavy heart that I write this morning. Yesterday a co-worker of my mom’s took his life. In the past year he had lost multiple family members of his own and was fighting his own battle with aggressive Parkinson’s disease.  He could no longer take it anymore. You can imagine the grief his family feels as they grapple with why life wasn’t worth living.

Loving the least of these

Many of you know my mom. One of the things that I love about my mom and that drives me crazy about her all at the same time is her ability to meet people and love them despite their quirks and crazies. She is notorious for the most hilarious stories about co-workers and neighbors. Years ago I would have thought she was enhancing the stories but since I have seen more and more how people feel comfortable with her and pour out their lives to her within hours of meeting. No matter your past or current predicament, she is a willing ear and on standby to make a meal, pay a visit, or drive you to the doctor. She loses sleep over her friends lives. As a pastors wife you would have expected her to befriend the women with the neatly pressed dresses and lives that seemed to be full of grace and patience but she has always befriended those that most desperately needed a friend.   And she enjoyed them for their quirkiness and helped them through dealing with their past of abuse, broken marriages, the birth of children, the loss of children, the death of aging parents, and even their own death.

I think specifically of her friend Chris. She was a character if I have ever known one. She had wiry red hair, a raspy smokers voice and was a spit fire if there ever was one. She talked loudly and was in everyone’s business. She worked at the school with my mom and was diagnosed with a rare degenerative muscle disorder. She went from being a lively, feisty lady working with special needs kids to losing her ability to care for herself. My mom faithfully drove to her home to lift her into her car to take her to church. For years. Chris had been through a couple of marriages and much heart ache in her life. My mom loved her through it.

I know this co-worker was no different for my mom. He sounded like a mess. She listened to his stories about the Parkinson’s deteriorating his memory and his dreams to retire that could not be fulfilled because he would have to live with his son due to his increasing caretaker needs. In the end he made up stories of going off to see a relative across the country who needed a kidney. He talked of donating one because he knew his body wasn’t going to need it much longer.  In reality he was building a plan to take his own life.

The truth is I find myself being more and more like my mom as I get older. I would much prefer for people to be real with me and to see who they really are than to have people feel like they need to impress me. I want to be my imperfect self and not feel the need to hide the rough around the edges parts.  I find that friendships are emotional and often inconvenient if you do them well. Rewarding and fulfilling as well but they take great effort!

I am so sad for my mom’s loss of a friend and co-worker.  And I am so sad to hear of yet another person who’s life wasn’t worth living. But I know that in his final days my mom was someone that showed him an example of Christ’s love and spoke honest truth into his life.  Loving the least of these isn’t about just feeding the hungry and taking in orphans. It’s about being kind and accepting of those people in our lives that don’t always have it together or don’t always believe the same way we do or live their lives like we do. It’s living our lives with hope and sharing it with the hopeless.